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10 Biblical Jokes

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  1. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems (Proverbs 1:32).
  2. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it (Isaiah 6:5-7).
  3. Why did Moses go to the doctor? Because he had a tablet that wouldn’t go away (Exodus 31:18).
  4. Why couldn’t Jonah trust the ocean? Because he knew there was something fishy about it (Jonah 1:17).
  5. How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it (Hebrews 11:24-27).
  6. Why did the Pharisees have a problem with Jesus’ disciples? Because they were always picking grain on the Sabbath (Mark 2:23-28).
  7. Why did Jesus’ disciples fish all night and catch nothing? Because they didn’t have a net income (Luke 5:1-11).
  8. What is the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop it a line (Matthew 4:19).
  9. What did Samson say when he saw the new haircut he got from Delilah? I can’t believe it’s not sheared (Judges 16:17-22).
  10. How does an archangel greet people? With halos and good cheer (Luke 2:8-14).
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